Lost in O'Hare with Clay Aiken

With Spamalot travel fast approching, I thought I’d take a look back at some travel days gone awry. On my last Spamalot travel day, it only took eight hours to complete a two hour flight. That’s a quick trip as compared to last Christmas.

You know how Clay Aiken fans are. We’ll go to absolutely any length to see Clay at his finest. Well, actually, Clay is always at his finest isn’t he. I’ve done planes, trains and automobiles and I’ve done them with the bestest of friends with interesting consequences. In my time as Clay’s fan which goes back to “take” I’ve experienced the good, bad and the ugly of travel. All of it fabulous simply because I’m either on my way to see Clay or I’m on my way home from seeing Clay.

Last Christmas, I just had to see the last show at Merrillville. Merrillville holds some wonderful memories as that was the site of the climax of the big note in All Is Well. Yay Clay and your big ol’ notes. The concert was fab, Clay was fab, my friends were fab, the weather was fab … until about 3 a.m. on that wonderful Sunday morning of December 23, 2007 when the great breeze and freeze of ’07 settled in.

Clay and I’m sure, many other fans were ……

LOST. ………………………….. IN O’HARE.

I Dunno … the day started out just like any other trip ending of tour day. Being dropped off at the airport … oh wait … it was a bit early. Too early as it turned out even to check my bag. So I waited an hour to check my bag and move on to the next level of pain. *grin* Only kidding. When QBBabe dropped me off she could not have known what was to follow. The agent encouraged me to change my flight and take an earlier one …. on the display it said that the earlier flight was delayed so I had plenty of time to catch it. I told him that I hated to give up a sure thing (ha) and change to a flight that was already delayed. He assured me (ha) that all would be well.

I rushed (again ha) over to the gate only to find the flight was not listed there. Went to the departure screens where many of us would gather throughout the day. Found the correct gate and hoofed it back over there to settle in with many who would become my LOST friends of the day.

We waited and waited and waited some more till the agent announced that the plane was broken and he would be rebooking people to another flight. He was doing connections first so I waited some more. Finally had a Mickey D (Clay and I have a connection) to hold me over. After falling asleep and felt my mouth gaping open .. doncha hate that? I got up and moved around. That’s when I noticed the lady in the wheelchair over by the gate agent so I went to visit with her. Asked her if she needed anything and she assured me she was fine. After chatting her up for a bit she did say she could use a trip to the Loo and that an agent had taken her earlier. I told her that was right up my alley as I needed something to do … so we visited the ladies and chatted some more. Her favorite expression which I heard at least 33 times that day was What can you do? in such a plaintive tone … This in regard to delayed and cancelled flights and any other natural disasters.

I told her I was going to take another short walk and that I’d be back. When I returned I asked her if she needed anything? Thirsty? Hungry? She admitted that she really could do with a McDonald’s cheeseburger and a glass of water. Off I went again to my favorite storefront restaurant for her lunch thinking this time I just might see Clay. I knew he was in a different terminal but a girl can dream. When I returned with nourishment, I think she ate it in two bites poor dear. Something to remember. If you see a person in a chair at an airport, don’t assume they’re being cared for. They may need the Loo or they may be hungry or thirsty. Lord knows they’re tired.

Sooooo …. I continued to wait for the agent to call my name and decided it was time to be proactive. I hoisted myself on over there and asked to be put on another flight which he did quickly. The guy was in control of the day. He told me the gate and told me to watch it though because it could change. So it goes. That plane was also broken and was sitting there like a wounded bird.

I meandered on over to the other gate only to find many familiar faces. The rest of the crowd joined us as they day wore on. Seating was limited and there were bodies on every surface. What I found interesting is that because the gate agent was calm and in control, the crowd of worn down to the nubs passengers remained calm. The agent never flinched, never showed any emotion, never any grim faces …nothing. He went about his business of getting his job done. I admired him greatly. He also moved to the next gate with us. I think there were two planeloads of passengers who were melded into one flight.

So, finally all the familiar faces were at one gate. Friendships were made with lots of laughter and goodwill. Some of the cast of hundreds:

*Extremely large black woman traveling with her granddaughter to Maine. She was a local. I sat with her for awhile while her darling granddaughter gave up her seat to another. Her most memorable statement was something like Ah don’ know what Ah be thinkin’ when Ah walked out da house dis mawnin thinking Ah would fly outta Chicago in da wintertime. Lawd, Lawd.

*The lady in the wheelchair, of all things, was visiting her sister who lives down the street from where my parents lived. She was going to visit her two sisters and her b-i-l was going to pick her up in at CVG. She could walk, but she needed the chair in the airport.

*Male (gay) flight attendant who had missed his earlier flight to NY because he said he was nonchalant about getting to the airport. I added the gay comment because that was so much a part of his charm. He was so entertaining to me and wheelchair lady. He lives on the 21st floor of a building on the lake in Chicago and talked about the winds during the night. He was afraid to go out on the balcony and haul his furniture in because he was afraid of being blown off the balcony. He was totally delightful and regaled us with stories. He was just having fun and entertaining us at the same time.

*The Minister. I sat by him for awhile but didn’t really get to “know” him till I got on the plane. He was my seatmate. He was concerned that he wouldn’t get on the plane at all.

*The young smooching couple trying to get to Birmingham for Christmas with their families.

*The trio I flew from CVG to Chicago on the same plane with. A woman, her husband and her b-i-l. When I first saw her Sunday, I said, I saw you somewhere before… at a concert, at the hotel…. Somewhere. Turns out I remembered her from Friday’s flight.
They had flown to Chicago through Cinti. from the Tricities (TN) because her husband and b-i-l had to attend the funeral of another brother. I visited them on and off over the course of the day for what seemed like hours. Just truly nice folk. Sooooo … people will tell you most anything when they have the time. The gal said she was hot, having a hot flash … her hub (now again, these are truly nice folk) said he was going through male menopause … that the dr had just informed him his testosterone levels were way low and they couldn’t find out why. He was taking hormones. I was so dying inside because this man who I had not known until a few hours before was telling me his boys weren’t doing the breast stroke anymore.

*The grim faced gal with the 60’s hairdo. Never cracked a smile .. even when we talked in Cinti.

*The traveling pilot who was apparently getting a freebie to Cinti … he disappeared after awhile realizing the case was hopeless.

And so on and on … just so many stories and such an interesting day.

I was very very glad that Delta/Comair didn’t put us on a plane and try to take off earlier in the day. That would truly have been LOST and I wasn’t ready for that. They really did the right thing and held us till it was safe enough to fly. I just have to wonder when Clay got out that day. He might not have fared much better than I did. I read where artquest took 16 hours to get home and four of those, I think, she spent in Dallas.

When we were finally called to board, I kind of didn’t believe it was happening. But board we did and some of those folks who hadn’t gone for rebooking didn’t make it onto the plane. The Large Black Lady missed out. They had sent her to and fro and failed to change her ticket.

On the plane, we were met with the most delightful Jerome-like flight attendant wearing a Santa hat. He was just what everyone needed to keep spirits light. There were people who had to leave the plane because of seat assignments being doubled up and they weren’t angry because of our Santa attendant. We were counted, we were asked our names and checked off on a list … this by the gate attendant who came onto the plane to do that. I was thinking maybe they wanted to be exactly sure who we were and where we sitting in order to notify next of kin …. Just kidding … Not.

After it was decided that we could stay on the plane … one guy accepted $400 to get off the plane and I immediately thought of a dear friend of ours who charges us $400 for everything … heh heh. Anyway, our Santa passed out water and peanuts telling us it was steak and shrimp … cracking up.

Now to the Man of God who sat next to me. I heard in line that he would be sitting next to me so as soon as I sat down, I put the armrest down marking my territory. Nothing wrong with a minister except the guy was quite large and I didn’t want him sitting on me. I’ve had the experience before and I didn’t want a repeat. Advice to newbies, always put the armrest down until you see who will be sitting next to you. It’s much more comfortable that way.

Minister was jolly like Santa and every sentence was punctuated with a laugh. It’s nice until it goes on for hours. He was traveling to Minneapolis. Minneapolis you might ask? Wasn’t he going the wrong direction? Why, yes he was. But, you see, he joined a special club for special airfares. It cost him $99 to join, he got the fare for $153 which was a deal plus he got a rebate of $100 after the trip. Now wasn’t that a deal? I told him he was reallllly paying for this deal and he had to agree. He wore a big black suit, with a white shirt with a white standup collar and a big chain with a cross hanging on it down below his ribs.

This was so interesting. His son’s x-wife won’t let his son have his child until 3pm on holidays. She’s mean and vicious. He likes the new wife. His daughter moved to MN and married someone she had just met. It lasted 6 months. Now she has a new husband. The first was abusive. The minister had traveled the world because his wife was an assistant to some wealthy guy. Seriously, Europe, the islands, private jets, you name it. Dined at the finest restaurants. Was going to move to AZ but when on a visit there last year, his wife had a stroke and then passed away. I heard so much about his family and his life. The interesting thing is that when he talked about MN, I said oh my BF friend lives there… not a bite. Then, later I said my nephew lives in St. Paul and goes to school there …. Not a bite….Intersting in that he had absolutely zero interest in me or my life. Could it be that since his wife died suddenly he just needs someone to talk to. I like to think that anyway.

There was more but I’m thinking this is enough.

We sat on the plane for probably three hours waiting for an appropriate time to take off and then the plane had to be deiced. By that time, I don’t think anyone was nervous or worried about the conditions, I think we just wanted closure. Ha Ha Ha Ha … it was a live or die situation and I think we were ready for the final jeopardy question and answer.

Takeoff was interesting but landing was much more interesting. It only took me 12 hours to get home from Chicago. I found out later that Clay and his family had a similar adventure.

My bag was somewhere with many other bags LOST in O’Hare and looking for adventure with Clay Aiken’s luggage.

I was happy to see and feel my bed. I have slept much since then.

The end.

p.s. Ah do love an adventure.

p.p.s. Lord I think I’m done with this. What fun! Thanks Clay!